Warning: this is an incoherent train of messy thoughts, not the usual blogs I write. This is raw, unfiltered me, pouring my heart out. Skip it at any point if you feel it’s not worth your time. Also, first time.

I feel old writing this. College is wrapping up, real soon. I still remember catching the half an hour flight to Silchar for the first time, the excitement of meeting everyone. And then time flew. Flew so fast. Like wind sweeping away sand that I held in my hands, before I knew it, I am left with too little, too soon. I am left here, standing with my hands cupped, almost empty.

I have always struggled with people. I can make friends quite easily, but keeping them around is something I haven’t been able to figure out. And it used to keep clawing me in the back of my mind. How a person who was so dear to me is now a stranger, just a gentle nod exchanged when we make an awkward eye contact.

I had a conversation on this with a friend. She posted a write up about this a few days ago - which in turn made me overthink about all these again. The TLDR of it is that it is inevitable, and we’re helpless to prevent it. People WILL come and go, changes will happen, irrespective of whether you want them or not. Time and change are the only constants in life, and we must accept the truth.

But somewhere deep down, we keep craving the old moments we share with people long gone from our lives. Which is humane. Which is what differentiates us from other primates. To feel emotions, to miss companionship.

Maybe we’re all butterflies, flying at our own beat, in a fleeting moment in the canvas of time.